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Annoyed by sales calls?

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Sue Compton
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Posted: Mon Jan 21st, 2008 07:59 pm

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Found at: http://www.richardneill.org/humour.php

Useful ways to annoy double-glazing salesmen and telemarketers

If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.
If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my goldfish just died..."
This works great if you are male: Telemarketer: "Hi, my name is Judy and I'm with XYZ Company..." You: Wait for a second and with a real husky voice ask, "What are you wearing?"
Cry out in surprise, "Patty! Is that you? Oh my God! Patty, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Patty a few brief moments of terror as she Tries to figure out where the hell she could know you from.
If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends... would you be my friend?"
After the Telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.
Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her HOME phone number so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their HOME numbers you say "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me, neither!" Hang up.
Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times.
Ask them to fax the information to you, and make up a number.
Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?"
Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to speak up...louder... louder...louder...
Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY, because you want to write EVERY WORD down.

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Kahiara
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Posted: Mon Jan 28th, 2008 05:49 pm

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I am going to use them for sure!

:evilgrin

*rubs hands* Muahaha! Thanks for them Sue, they were really amusing

Den
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Posted: Tue Jan 29th, 2008 04:50 am

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Funny stuff, I heard a comedian suggest that you should say,

"Come on in, we'll take a bath and talk about it"

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manishthatte
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Posted: Sat Feb 16th, 2008 02:40 pm

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Sue Compton:

Now there is one completely non-palmistry related solution I used myself.

The irritation of telemarketing calls was so much for me, that I refused to be even disturbed into knowing that my phone is ringing due to such a call.

I solved it in 2 steps:
Step 1) Identify all such calls. Most of such calls come from a selected few numbers. Save all such numbers under some name like eg. 'Banned'

Step 2) What I did was, I recorded a blank 5 sec .mp3 using magicsoft.
Save that file to your phone. Then set the ringing tone for all calls from 'banned' to that blank.mp3 (In most goods phones, you can do that. I personally have a nokia N80, so it was pretty easy for me.)

And lo ...
Whenever a telemerketeer calls you, the phone rings a 'blank' rigntone

No need to be disturbed in your task.
Whenever you will check back your phone for some actual task, you will see that you have got a missed call from Banned.
End of matter. And bye bye Mr. Telemarketeer

Janice
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Posted: Wed Feb 20th, 2008 05:11 am

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I totally agree ...they can be pests

But I really feel for the guys doing the job though.!!!

There have been a couple of newspaper reports here recently that there is a worrying level of stress related illness suffered by the workers in that industry especially in countries where the idea has been recently imported. Not only Low wages but also brutal emotional conditions can result from having to follow a proscribed verbage that everyone hates and tells you so!!!

Sales is a tough business at the best of times....those poor guys are having the worst of times!!!

Janice

s.s.singh
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Posted: Mon Sep 22nd, 2008 05:49 pm

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hi kahiara,

h                     h

h                     h

h                     h

h h h h h h h

h                      h

h                      h

h                      h appy Birthday To you

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s.s.singh
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